Santiago would like to marry Alberto on 23-J, but he does not dare to come out of the closet because of that so Spanish thing about “what will they say”, because he has always implied that he is an enemy of same-sex marriages. In addition, Santiago, like the Matamoros of medieval chronicles, is swashbuckling (or at least, that is the image she needs to give among those close to him). Despite this, Alberto is confident that, when the date arrives, she will at least be able to seal a marriage of convenience with Santiago. Both families, that of Santiago and that of Alberto, have already joined in another 140 links (called “coalition”) and live together in Castilla y León, Extremadura, the Balearic Islands or Valencia. So Alberto hopes that Santiago will say “yes I do” and they can embrace each other and give each other a forbidden kiss, even if only in the privacy of the Moncloa Palace bedroom.

But, there is another wedding scheduled for 23-J that endangers the consummation of the marriage between Santiago and Alberto (or Alberto and Santiago, because he rides so much).

And it is that Pedro wants to marry Yolanda that same day, even if it is only civilly, without going through the altar (on the other hand, if Santiago and Alberto were to get married, it is already known that they would do so in the Basilica of the Valley of the Fallen). But Yolanda and Pedro are more progressive and prefer more friendly ceremonies. Without going any further, Pedro was the one who came up with the idea that the Spanish would stop wearing ties to save energy.

But make no mistake, if Pedro manages to prevent his archenemies Alberto and Santiago from getting married and, at the same time, convinces Yolanda to consummate their wedding, this will be a mess that will be remembered forever. A total surprise, which not even Mr. CIS, the person in charge of officiating the pre-marriage course, would have ever imagined.

It is even very possible that it has just been decided whether Alberto and Santiago or Pedro and Yolanda get married on 23-J due to the invitations that arrive by mail. Who was going to tell us that, in the 21st century of high technology, postmen would have the last word on the choice of the “boyfriends of Spain”, beyond Tamara Falcó and Íñigo Onieva.

The uncertainty is even greater, because there is another second factor that can tip the balance of which couple will be able to get married this Sunday, July 23: the “peripheral” guests, that is, those who must give their vows to the future spouses from places as far away from the Madrid capital as Catalonia or the Basque Country. In this sense, Alberto and Santiago have it worse, because they don’t get along at all well with Mertxe, Oskar, Iñaki, Aitor or Mikel, but neither with Gabriel or Míriam. And much less with Oriol and Carles. The latter, if he could, would even dig up the cannons from the Battle of Waterloo to prevent the wedding of Alberto and Santiago.

For their part, Pedro and Yolanda have more good tabloids among the Iñakis and the Mertxes, they have even been half-friends of Gabriel, although Míriam, following Carles’ instructions, will not make it easy for Pedro and Yolanda if they want to marry with his approval. In the end, it is also true that, no matter how much the Catalan and Basque peripheral guests are hard pressed, it seems that it is better for all of them if Pedro and Yolanda get married instead of Alberto and Santiago.

But, of course, when it comes to the heart, you never know and perhaps everyone would like to encourage divorces rather than weddings, not because “those who fight want each other”, nor because “opposites attract”, but because it is already known that “married people who separate, eternal fire is prepared”.