‘She can no longer suffer, that I kiss her in the neck. Or touching her breasts. Or kisses. She has many rules of what I must not.’
Have you also experienced that your partner is better to express what she likes in bed, than what she would actually like?
Although you are quite willing to satisfy your gf, grow your frustrations, as you know more about her turn offs than her turn ons.
She is no less frustrated, as she can’t explain the inexplicable. And at the same time, she feels, you expect that she needs to deliver excitement, when you press button a, b or c. Which increases her irritation over the fact that you do it.
She knows not what she should ask, though, because everything feels wrong.
See also: Here’s the secret to great sex
As a clinical psychologist and sex therapist Marianne Brandon explains, it then becomes sex just tolerable, if you can only communicate what you do not want. It doesn’t make sex great.
It requires some completely different skills, for good sex is less about where and how he touches her, and more about the presence he brings in the bed.
For his masculine presence is the most potent aphrodisiac of all, according to Brandon.
Unfortunately, the presence hard to define, although women can recognize it when they experience it. The woman loses sexual interest in the man who does not exude this energy.
See also: sex therapist has the answer: This should all men know about women
This is some of the ingredients in the masculine presence, as Marianne Brandon describes it:
A direct, fixed gaze.A confident, respectful and non-timid sexual style.To keep your head high and maintain an emotional intensity without laughing or due to the babysnak.Self-esteem without narcissism.Assertiveness without aggression and self-assertion.Emotional vulnerability without fearfulness.Tenderness without passivity.
This masculine presence awakens a woman’s body and sexual instincts, claims Brandon. And men without the presence is enough attractive partners, but hardly for their sexual potential.
They are probably more friendly, flexible, non-hazardous. Good medforældre, respectful and courteous lovers, determined to satisfy. Unfortunately, being predictable, polite sex, over time, boring and not worth the trouble for some women.
Here it is very worrying for the man, when he experiences the more he tries to please his girlfriend, the less respect she him. So her lack of intimate enthusiasm damages his self-esteem. The limping sex life demoralizes her. She feels sexual closed opposite her husband, but she doesn’t know how she should change it.
See also: Zen and the art of maintaining a sex life
It requires a parindsats to change a lagging sex life for the better. But one thing is your boyfriend’s lack of enthusiasm about sex, something else is that you can even do something to cultivate your masculine presence.
Sexperterne – 19. aug. 2017 – at. 11:53 How is men – also: Not only looking for quick release
You must listen to your body and your heart, which may sound a little silly. Nevertheless, you can try these exercises, according to Brandon:
Think back to an experience where you felt strong and full of self-esteem. It can be, when you got the ønskejobbet, built carporten or banged his wife in the beginning of the relationship.Stand up. Feel the strength and self-esteem from the memories in the body. Feel how your legs are stuck, your chest swells, a slight butterflies in the stomach.Use your breathing to amplify these sensations – as if you screw up for them with each deep, slow breath.Feel, how your gaze intensified, while your face becomes more serious, focused, attentive.Take ownership of your strength. Pay attention to your body while you are alert to your surroundings – as a lion stalker his prey.Move you around while you get used to experiencing the world from this perspective. It takes time, for it is not the case, you tend to be in the world.
This man needs to be in bed.
to begin with you will feel vulnerable, because it is your authentic I show up in the presence. You save you do not, you are not emotionally closed and you don’t protect yourself.
See also: Mandeterapeut to the Danish man: Ta’ you now together!
In bed will a woman respect and rely more on a man who is emotionally present than a man who is closed.
The more in tune with your feelings, you yourself are, the more in line with her experience you will get. If you can better brand your own feelings, you are more responsive to her.
She feels seen by you and will thus be better able to feel your feelings and feel themselves closer to you. This is superpotente non-verbal aphrodisiacs that women respond to.
So when she says, ‘I don’t want you touching me that way,’ she says maybe also: ‘I need to feel your masculine energy to be able to enjoy you touching me that way.’
Sexperterne – 16. jun. The 2015 kl. 00:24 Woman – how to get you are going to want more sex
the Sexpert-TV from the archive: Man you up with mandeterapeuten
