After several experiences of relationships that did not come to fruition, one begins to reflect on the true causes for which the couple broke up. And if the problem is yourself? Even if you try, you may not be a good life partner for the other party. Even falling into the false belief that you are a better partner than you really are.
A good part of the negative behaviors that are repeated and that affect the sentimental life of a person are related to certain problems of insecurity and low self-esteem that that same individual suffers. This leads to generating false expectations or forcing the situation excessively.
Understanding why they fail in their relationships is one of the most common reasons for consultation in therapy, as stated by the American psychologist Mark Travers. However, sometimes you are responsible for these outcomes, especially when you fall into three very frequent errors.
The first of these has to do with over-romanticizing a partner, even if this relationship is not even settled yet. The failure comes when you idealize a person and the type of relationship you want, and expect, to live next to them. In this way, expectations are created that can be very far from reality and that result in great disappointments when they are not met.
Another reason is trying to start a relationship with someone who just got out of another, especially with some desperation. This attitude leads to toxic behavior, which denotes a lack of sensitivity when it comes to giving space and time to people. Many times relationships are started despite not having gotten over the ex-partner yet, which will be a drag on the new one that is developing. And that possibly ends up failing for this reason.
One of the big headaches: waiting for commitment from someone with whom you have had sex. It often happens that one of the two parties is looking for something more, a more serious relationship project than what began with a fleeting encounter. However, the other person may only be up for that and may not be interested in a commitment at all.
In these cases, the best way to tackle the situation is through communication. That is, express yourself and talk to that person about the direction of the relationship. There will be cases in which there is no way to go, but, in others, it is possible that a possibility may open up.
