The recent advice from a psychology professor at the University of Southern California published in The New York Times suggests that parents should actually ignore their children more often. This goes against the current cultural norm of constantly supervising, entertaining, and teaching our children. The idea is that by doing less for our children, we can actually help them thrive.
Historically, children were part of intergenerational social groups where they were not heavily supervised, allowing them to learn and grow in a more natural way. Children’s brains are wired for curiosity and learning, and they can pick up language and other skills simply by being around adults.
The article argues that children don’t always need to be the center of attention and that it’s okay for parents to focus on their own lives and conversations. Children have the opportunity to observe, play, and practice on their own, which can teach them valuable skills like sharing, problem-solving, and independence.
While it may seem counterintuitive, letting children have more unsupervised time can actually benefit them. Neuroscience suggests that a resting brain is not idle, but rather tends to think about other people’s minds. This can help children develop empathy and imagination, as well as the ability to entertain themselves.
The article also mentions the Free-Range Kids movement, which promotes giving children more freedom and independence. The movement encourages parents to let their children do things on their own and step back a bit to allow them to grow and learn. By trusting children to take on new challenges, they can develop competence and confidence.
In conclusion, the article suggests that a collective shift in parenting is needed to address the issue of overburdened parents and over-assisted children. By recognizing children’s natural curiosity and abilities, and by giving them the space to explore and learn on their own, we can help them thrive. Trusting children to do things independently can have a positive impact on their development and well-being.
