It is increasingly common for psychologists to welcome couples in their consultations who seek to resolve their conflicts and improve aspects of their relationship in a conscious and healthy way. And for that, sometimes you need to go to couples therapy. In these sessions, different communication problems, cases of loss of trust, difficulties in living together, as well as another series of complications within the relationship can be treated. A service that is increasingly requested by young people in psychological consultations.
Although it may seem like an excellent measure to deal with the difficulties that a couple is going through, both members do not always agree with resorting to this alternative. Sometimes, one of them doesn’t want to go to couples therapy. Which causes the other party to feel frustrated in this situation and not know how to act. In this case, the first thing will be to understand the reason for this reluctance and the most advisable way to manage it.
One of the main thoughts that usually cause anguish and discomfort in the person who wants to go to therapy is that their partner, who refuses, no longer cares about the relationship. However, psychologist Amy Morin explains that this does not have to be the case, but that there are many other possible reasons behind this rejection.
One of the most common reasons, according to the specialist, has to do with the economic factor. Since there are people who consider it a high expense to start couples therapy sessions. So they decide to prioritize other types of expenses above that.
It is also usually due to the reluctance to share the couple’s intimacy with someone else, due to the prevailing desire to keep those feelings and relationship problems private. Even those around you could find out about the simple fact of going to couples therapy. And there are other people who are concerned about the possibility that these sessions will worsen the situation and become a source of conflict and arguments.
The psychologist offers some advice on how to manage a situation in which one part of the couple wants to go to therapy and the other does not. In this case, it is best to talk to the other person in a positive and empathetic way. As well as explaining what the intention of that therapy is, that is, what you want to work on in it.
For example, the specialist proposes a communication of this style: “I think couples therapy could be a good idea for us. I would love to learn how to communicate better and solve problems without walking away every time I get angry. What do you think?” However, she insists that one should not argue or beg for a refusal, but rather respect it, at least for the moment.
