When these perplexing dates arrive, I always look for answers in the great men, whose lives inspire in pivotal moments. What would Napoleon Bonaparte think of the invisible friend, gifts from the invisible friend and company dinners without a gender checker?
(And who says Napoleon Bonaparte, says Winston Churchill or Pablo Iglesias junior).
For some time now, the first three weeks of December have become Russia’s campaign without general winter. Everyone goes ahead and schedules merrily. Instead of the traditional excuse of “let’s leave it for after the holidays” – see January and February are boring and have free days and nights! – we’ve agreed to densify, compress and crush the days leading up to Christmas
I believe that Napoleon Bonaparte would disapprove of this social slalom and would shoot the first corporal who suggested exchanging modest, bland and predictable gifts under the pretext of teaming up on the eve of the Battle of Borodino.
– What you want, Dupont, you bastard, is to give me the runaround.
Nor would it have seemed like a good idea to the great heart to organize a military company dinner to strengthen the emotional bonds between the grenadier captain and his subordinates, who when they really enjoy it is muttering that Captain Dutroux, the cellajunt of Arcachon , is meant to be Marshal Laffite’s niece.
And the fact is that Napoleon, like Miguel Muñoz, was not in favor of company dinners because the boys lost their minds, with the risk of overdoing it with the waitresses of the Dumas inn while concentrated on the outskirts of Borodino or at the Arcipreste hotel from Navacerrada jumped fresher on the battlefield.
-Josefina, don’t worry, I’m invading Russia and on Christmas Day we’ll celebrate it without my brother Josep, let’s see if we marry him to a Basque and he’ll get rid of him.
Napoléon Bonaparte would have forbidden citizens from inflating themselves on aubergine croquettes, giving away kitchen aprons with breasts and drinking Cors anise before December 25, reserving the right to the monkey for the aforementioned holiday.
