Unlike the Grand Duchy of Luxembourg, in Spain citizens want and dream of appearing on television, if possible live. And those on television know it…

Why do Spaniards enjoy appearing on television these days? It is the atavistic Grandparents watching Eurovision – Spain, zero points! –, the experts, La Clave, the weather report, all.

Roger Pons, 27, has appeared on television. And no less than in the morning program of Ana Rosa Quintana, the televised Ayuso, where she let loose a sentence from the heritage that is passed down from generation to generation in the peninsula:

– I’ve been here two hours waiting. You’re going to eat my p…!

(This is what I, a member of the audience, was thinking).

That Roger has had a complicated week and broke out live and live because Ana Rosa’s had promised him a few minutes of glory, but they had him waiting for the intemperata. So he let go of the sentence and got up from the table, with the misfortune of making the effect that his manly member was going to show, on behalf of the collective of victims of delays and abuses in television appearances, club founded by the great Paco Umbral.

Aware that the Ministry of Equality would not give her coverage in the manner of Rocío Carrasco, Ana Rosa Quintana ordered the music of the work to be stopped and simply said, calmly, like the beauties who know Latin, that her guest was a “bad guy” (as if to go to dinner with her) and he had to be “very ugly” (and I say typical of a sardine on the Costa Brava).

The citizen was summoned to explain, as a witness and by video conference, the incident on a night bus in Barcelona whose driver let off a passenger who made her uncomfortable by shouting “queen”, “beautiful” and things like the style, instead of asking him, under the “No talking to the driver” sign, if the bus stopped at Barceloneta or where Trauma was, the former home of the divorced man.

Roger wanted to appear on television but at the agreed time and expressed his discomfort at the wait in a bad way. Luckily it wasn’t breakfast time because half of Spain heard the popular phrase…