Asma Yawari, a teenager from Illinois, has developed a close relationship with her Afghan cousin. It’s made the geographical distance between them seem less.

Although they never met, the cousins have become close friends through phone calls and text messages. They swap family photos, language lessons and hairstyles and share future goals. The cousins fear that their worlds will become more crowded after the Taliban return to power. Already, shared experiences like going to school and dressing up are disappearing. This is replaced by the fear of the cousin’s departure, as well as others in Afghanistan.

Asma, 17, says that they have similar aspirations and goals. “The only difference between us is that we are able to reach those goals and aspirations.”

Many older Afghan girls are already worried about their future and fear of losing out on great career opportunities. Perhaps none is more concerned for them than their faraway sisters, cousins, and friends.

Bahara, a 13-year-old cousin, told Asma that she is upset that girls in her age group have been called back to school but not girls above sixth grade. Even if she is allowed to return, she wonders if her dreams may not be possible under Taliban rule.

She dreams of becoming a fashion designer. She says, “I’m just going give up on it.” It’s very sad.

Asma, who helped organize Chicago protests to support Afghans fleeing the country following the Taliban takeover in Afghanistan, is concerned about her family’s safety and that of her female cousins.

She says, “I always think that could be me.”

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After the rise of Taliban, the status of Afghan women has been a focal point of international attention.

The group had a history of restricting women’s access to the public sphere between 1996 and 2001. They largely kept them in their homes during their previous rule. Even though they promise more freedoms and rights, this track record is still very evident.

Over the past decades, Afghanistan has been used by competing powers as a ground for their proxy wars. Nura Sediqe, a Princeton School of Public and International Affairs lecturer, said that Afghanistan’s status is often at its heart.

The last 20 years have brought opportunities for women in Sediqe’s family in Herat province, but then there were still fatalities in rural Afghanistan so I felt guilty.”

Mejgan Massoumi (an Afghan American historian) says that Afghan women have a diversity of experiences.

She says that while some girls and women were able to go to school and get a job, others had to face economic and social obstacles.

Women may be more visible and have greater rights in larger cities like Kabul than they are in rural areas.

The education of girls has been a battleground with uneven progress.

Multiple barriers, including cultural norms and familial disapproval as well as security fears, financial worries, security concerns, financial pressures, long distances to schools, and a shortage of female teachers, have prevented significantly more girls from attending school than boys, particularly when they reach adolescence. According to UNICEF’s 2019 report,

Omar Abdi UNICEF’s Deputy Executive Director, said that enrollments in schools rose from one million children in 2001, when Taliban rule was overthrown, to nearly 10 million today, with 4 million girls. He said that 4.2 million children, including 2.6 millions girls, are still out of school despite this progress.

Abdi said that the education gains of the last two decades must not be rolled back and added that he urged Taliban to allow all girls to resume learning.

In mid-October, Abdi stated that only five provinces in Afghanistan allow girls to attend secondary school. Abdi, Taliban’s education minister, said that they are working on a framework they will soon announce which will allow all girls to attend secondary school.

Although the Taliban try to present themselves as more moderate than they were during their previous rule, many Afghans remain skeptical.

According to Ali A. Olomi (a Penn State University assistant professor in Islamic and Middle East History), the Taliban are “taking their own, unique interpretations of Islamic law and fusing them with their cultural understandings of women’s rights, and women’s access into the public sphere,” stressing that Islam strongly supports education.

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Masouma Tajik is concerned that her younger sisters might not have the same opportunities as her. She has worked in Kabul as a data analyst.

The career-minded, 22-year old Tajik graduated with honors from the American University of Afghanistan.

She recalls feeling afraid shortly before the Taliban took Kabul. She says, “The first reason I was afraid was my freedom to live as a women.” “I spent so much time and effort on this career.”

Tajik fled Afghanistan to seek asylum in Eastern Europe after the Taliban tookover. She has been applying for scholarships and refugee programs in various countries.

Her sisters remained behind in Herat, along with the rest of her family.

When they spoke, one of her sisters answered less: She doesn’t go school (their youngest sibling does). Tajik says that the sister used to tell Tajik she wanted to join army. Tajik said that her voice was a sign of her sadness. Recently, the sister began to share that she had been going out, including in the park, and that she was also studying English at home.

Tajik doesn’t know how to help; her life is in limbo.

Tajik said, “I’m just like giving them hope.” Tajik says, “I have nothing and no plan for them. She is aware of this.”

Nazia, 30 years old, is missing her younger sister in Afghanistan. They were separated when Nazia left Kabul for America two years ago. Hena, however, remained in Kabul.

Hena is becoming increasingly unsure of the future.

Nazia, who did not want her last name to be used to protect Afghanistan’s identity, will try to cheer her up at times. Other times she will join her in crying.

Hena’s dream since childhood was to become a doctor.

She says that “everything has been taken from us”, using Zoom as Nazia’s translation. She assists her mother with household chores and sometimes reads her textbooks. Uncertain when or if she will be able use them again in a classroom.

Nazia is helpless, “I can’t make anything for them.”

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Bahara in Afghanistan claims that she has been counting down the days since the sixth grade was over and girls have not been allowed to go back to school.

As she managed to juggle going to school, doing homework, and taking courses outside in English and sewing, the time flew by.

She searched Instagram for inspiration for fashion design ideas. Her family thought it was inappropriate for her to post photos but she could browse. She made dresses for her sister and herself with the sewing machine her mother gave her.

Her world has collapsed. She lost a close friend who had helped her plan a fashion design project. She is no longer able to attend the courses she used. She keeps a low profile by wearing a long, black dress when she goes out, and a black headscarf that frames her face. She deleted from her phone all photos of her wearing dresses she made.

Bahara claims that a sister doesn’t want her to go back to school, even if she is allowed to, because she fears Taliban harassment. But not her.

She says, “I miss my teachers and my books, but I love my friends.” “Every morning I wake up and see the clock. I feel like that was the right time to be at school.”

Bahara’s family is one of many reasons why they are leaving the country.

It’s a great way to get some relief by texting or talking with Asma, her cousin.

Bahara keeps the good memories of her birthday party shortly before Kabul fell under the Taliban. She didn’t even have any clothes. “I made a beautiful gown in one night.”

She was surrounded by her childhood friends, and she laughed, played games, and lit the candles.

She says, “I believe that was the last time that I was happy.” “After that,… there is no time to worry.”

Asma attended her school’s recent homecoming. She hesitated about posting photos online, but she did post photos of herself in a baby blue dress, posing with friends, and dressed up. She didn’t want her family or cousin to think that she was displaying her freedom.

She says, “If I go hang out with my buddies, I feel guilty.” “I feel guilty. It’s like talking about it.”