They are a minority, but they are happier. They live outside social networks to embrace real life. They don’t have Instagram, Facebook, or Twitter. Neither is LinkedIn, much less TikTok. They do not spend a daily average of almost two hours in the digital environment, nor do they check their phone hundreds of times a day. In exchange, they are spared the anxiety of constantly comparing themselves to others and building their own digital identity. They assure that they do not lose anything because they prioritize having fewer relationships and experiences but of higher quality. They champion a growing trend: emotional minimalism.
As soon as they wake up, the first thing most people do is check their mobile phone. Different studies indicate that throughout the day we will do it at least 150 times. This is not the case of Marc Reverté, 22 years old, philosophy and social education student. Marc hasn’t posted anything on his Instagram account for five years. He tries to live outside of social networks, which he uses only on specific occasions. Unlike his contemporaries, he does not need to build his identity through the network, nor constantly share his experiences.
Numerous studies link some of the mental health problems of generation Z, which includes young people between 16 and 24 years old, with the misuse of social networks. According to American psychology professor Jean Twenge, author of the book iGen, spending less face-to-face time with friends and spending more hours in front of the screen makes today’s young people feel alone, sad and isolated. “I am a person who does not like to receive constant stimulation and know everything from everyone at all times. When I meet a person I haven’t seen in a while, I take the opportunity to catch up. I have never missed anything by not having Instagram. I keep in touch with my friends through Whatsapp or in person,” adds Marc.
“Among my group of friends, there are more and more girls who are leaving Instagram because they say they are tired of seeing things from people who don’t interest them,” says Marina Luna Dorado, 22 years old, graduated in labor relations and currently looking for work. She also prefers to stay away from the digital maelstrom. She doesn’t have Instagram but she doesn’t feel FOMO – fear of missing out – but JOMO – joy of missing out. “I love taking photos and even more socializing, which is why I see my friends every day! It is true that most of them have social networks and sometimes there are conversations about things that happen there, but they explain it to me naturally and they do not make me feel displaced for not being on the networks,” she adds.
“I have between five and ten friends and not thousands.” The speaker now is J.E., a 21-year-old young man, computer engineer and software developer, who prefers to remain anonymous. He also prioritizes having fewer digital relationships, aware that the links generated through social networks are usually weaker than those generated in face-to-face environments. He is part of a group of young people who not only avoid excess experiences and material things, but also meaningless connections and excess emotional clutter. They apply the Marie Kondo method to personal relationships.
“Sometimes I feel alone, but like everyone else. I wouldn’t change anything if I had Instagram. I’m not interested in seeing people’s perfect lives. If it was his real life, then maybe I would think about it. These last few years, my life has been going to university in the morning and spending the entire afternoon in the library. I don’t think it would have helped me to see that everyone was having a great time while I was just studying,” adds J.E. Although he acknowledges that during the pandemic he opened a profile on Discord, a platform similar to Skype, to interact with his closest friends. “I had to open a profile to feel accompanied during the 12 or 13 hours I spent studying during confinement.” None of them deny technology, but they use it in moderation and for their own benefit.
Another advantage of living outside of social networks is not submitting to the beauty canon imposed by algorithms. Last month, the Wall Street Journal revealed that Facebook Inc, the company founded by Mark Zuckerberg and owner of Instagram and WhatsApp, recognizes that abusive use of Instagram harms the health of young women. According to an internal report, one in three teenagers said Instagram made them feel worse about their bodies. They also blamed the social network for increases in the rate of anxiety and depression.
Within social networks, filter bubbles are created where adolescents with eating disorders, such as anorexia and bulimia, share content about unhealthy habits to achieve ideal bodies. Recently, the ‘Journal of Medical Internet Research’ published the findings of an investigation led by researcher Ana Freire, director of the Technology Area at the UPF School of Management, on the behavior of these communities: they are completely isolated and connected to each other. through the internet and are highly harmful.
Young people talk about Instagram as if it were a drug, although they have a hard time pinpointing the addictive ingredients. One of the pioneers of the internet, Jaron Lanier, published the book Ten Reasons to Delete Your Social Networks Immediately in 2018 to explain these mechanisms. Lanier warns that social affection in the form of followers, likes, and comments is highly seductive. Facebook IC., aware of the bad reputation the company gains among young people, has recently experimented with hiding the number of likes on Instagram photos. And it has modified the algorithm to reduce exposure to celebrity content about fashion, beauty and relationships, while increasing that of close friends.
In Spain, 85% of Internet users between 16 and 70 years old use social networks, which represents close to 27 million individuals, according to the latest report from IAB Spain. The main reasons for not using social networks are lack of interest, lack of time and privacy protection. Of these 15% of rejecters, almost half say they have no interest in opening a profile in the near future.
“It seems to me that there has not been a social debate about what companies do with our data and I do not want to participate in it. I think our privacy is at stake and that we should debate it,” says Anna Barba, 24, a graduate in Hispanic philology and Romance languages ??who works as an educator at a social foundation.
Anna closed her Facebook account during ESO because she realized that she ended up entering into dynamics that did not make her feel good and that she herself criticized. “I would surprise myself by uploading content so that the person I liked would see it and talk to me or gossiping about what that person was doing without daring to talk to them. In short, things that lead to nothing. I have never had Instagram or Tinder, because the world of image, of posturing, does not interest me,” she adds.
Tinder plays an important role in the lives of Spaniards, in general, and young people, in particular. In fact, 50% claim to use this application daily between March and April 2021, according to Statista data. Of them, 20% even several times a day. But is it advisable to use social applications several times a day to find a partner? Does it bear fruit? “During the quarantine everyone started Tinder, although not exactly to look for love,” explains Marina. “I think it’s hard to find anything profound there. Although it all depends on what you put in the profile, I guess. I have friends who found a partner,” she adds. “The problem with dating apps is that it’s easy to misuse them,” says Marc. “Just looking for a partner already seems like a bad start. And guiding yourself only by photographs is not too deep.”
Albert Montreal, a 34-year-old screenwriter from Barcelona, ??had an unhealthy relationship with WhatsApp: “I felt very dependent on the phone and it was exhausting for me to live with the constant notifications because I had the impression that they only brought me noise. So in 2014 I closed WhatsApp and since then I use social networks very moderately. When I start a new job I have to give a lot of explanations but once certain routines are established, everything works normally. I use email to communicate with my work colleagues and calls to talk to friends and family.”
Whatsapp is the instant messaging channel most used by Spaniards. And that is why it is the most difficult network to abandon. Anna tried it a few years ago but it was impossible for her. “But we can call each other!” she told my friends and colleagues, but they didn’t understand. So I had to go back.” In this case, group pressure prevailed. In any case, Whatsapp is not a social network and you don’t have to keep an eye on followers, likes, and constant updates.
Surviving in the workplace without networks is a chimera. “To look for work there is no escape: you have to do it in the digital environment,” says Marina. “In fact, a while ago I had a resume in hand and they told me that they could not accept it due to data protection issues. So I have LinkedIn, although it doesn’t work too well for me,” she adds.
For a while it seemed that the more connected we were, the more we would achieve professionally and the more fulfilled we would be privately. In the end, excess information and relationships have turned out to be detrimental to the health of many people and now some tend to maintain less but higher quality interaction. It is not about rejecting technology, but about using it responsibly. In the words of Marc Reverté: “It’s about controlling social networks so that they don’t control you.” Welcome to the era of emotional minimalism.
