Marian Rojas Estapé, psychiatrist and writer, has addressed the delicate topic of toxic relationships during her speech at a conference in Mexico. In her speech, she highlighted how to identify and manage toxicity in our closest relationships, offering strategies to preserve our emotional and physical health.
“When you have a poison in the closest person, be it a partner, son, daughter-in-law, son-in-law, father-in-law, brother-in-law, brother, someone who deeply upsets you, it is crucial to ask yourself: Why does it affect me so much?” explained Rojas Estapé. According to the psychiatrist, it is essential to understand what makes us vulnerable to these people and how they destabilize us in a matter of seconds.
Rojas Estapé highlighted that no one is toxic by nature, but rather certain behaviors and situations trigger this toxicity. “It’s because someone says exactly what you know is going to make you suffer, constantly judges you or doesn’t value you,” he said. Identifying these patterns is the first step to protecting ourselves.
Once toxicity in a relationship has been diagnosed, Rojas Estapé advises evaluating the emotional impact it has on us. “I feel insecure, sad, alone, humiliated. “I am allowing this person to inflame my stress, alter my health and shorten my years of life,” he noted, highlighting the connection between chronic stress and cellular aging.
Citing the work of Dr. Elizabeth Blackburn, Nobel winner in 2009, Rojas Estapé explained how stress and suffering can shorten telomeres, the caps of chromosomes, accelerating aging and the onset of diseases. “If we don’t manage a toxic brother-in-law well, we are taking years off our lives,” she warned.
To counteract this effect, Rojas Estapé proposes the use of a “psychological raincoat.” “You prepare yourself internally and decide that you are not going to allow that person to shorten your telomeres today. You become the owner of your relationships, instead of being a slave to those who make you suffer,” he concluded.
With these tools, the psychiatrist invites people to protect their well-being and take control of their interactions, preventing toxic relationships from negatively affecting their health and life.