Mélani Olivares frees herself from judgments: "I decide to live differently because it works out for me; and what they think doesn't matter to me"

There are celebrities who do not let go of their private life; others who falsify it with posturing and images of fake happiness; and then there is the actress Meláni Olivares, who with her first book, Momento Re, has opened a peephole for anyone who wants to discover her reality, her reflections and the decisions that have been defining her life. What does the “re” mean? “It is the constant restart, reinventing, reliving…”, she sums up.

She says that it is not a biography or a self-help book, but it can help many people to get rid of fears, judgments, preconceived ideas, labels, and above all help to “let oneself be”, as this actress likes to repeat. , born in Badalona 50 years ago. “We spend our lives judging ourselves. The life of each one is their circumstances and the decisions they make. And they are neither good nor bad. Let’s stop blaming and recognize that mistakes are part of the process of life. Enough of whipping us ”, she reflects during a talk in a cafeteria on a Barcelona rooftop. She is accompanied by the other half of her book, her friend Bea Cuevas, a graphic designer, who encouraged her to make this intimate portrait.

Mélani became an actress because of the need she had to express herself. She did dance until she was 15 years old, and then she earned a good living as an advertising model. At the age of 20, she got her springboard: the Firewood program for the rubber monkey. And she hasn’t stopped.

She is the mother of three children: Martina, adopted, 17 years old; Manuela, the result of her relationship with Javier Rojas, 11 years old, and Lucho, who she had with her ex-husband Gorka González, 6 years old. All three have different last names. This is his “tribe”. “I feel that I have my family and that nobody cares what I do. To me, the conventional family causes me rejection to live it myself, but I love my friends who have that type of family and are happy. I decide to live differently because it comes out to me, it is born that way. And since I don’t judge the rest, I don’t care what they think of me”. Living with a partner has already tried it and says that it is not for her. “A partner for life, no, that’s a long time. The established and traditional does not work for me. Everything that is for a long time gives me claustrophobia ”.

Being an only child marked her. “I was so bored.” And she was always clear that she would have a large family. “If it were up to me, I would still have children,” he laughs. Marti, Manue and Lu are her absolute priority and when she is asked, as a single mother, how she organizes herself, she answers: “Well, like all of them”. She is now shooting a series, Beguinas, for Antena 3. She has been working nights for a few days, so she leaves home at 6 in the afternoon and returns at 6 in the morning. “My order is in chaos. I get bored with order and monotony. Knowing what’s going to happen isn’t cool.” In August she will take a break and she will go with her children to the Costa Brava and Cádiz.

One of the episodes that she reveals in the book has led her to grab headlines is that before going to Ethiopia to look for her first daughter, she became pregnant and decided to have an abortion, because if she continued with the pregnancy, they would take her out of the adoption process that had started two years earlier. She has been heavily criticized. “We have come across the church. It’s just that I don’t care. Freedom stirs the other, that a woman is free, has relationships with whoever she wants, that she does not have a man to take care of her tribe… that stirs many ”.

He considers that the most important thing he has learned over the years is “that nothing ever happens. And if it happens, nothing happens either. That gives a lot of peace of mind. You learn to live without the weight of what they will say… In life, we must not take ourselves too seriously”.

The one who was Paz in Aída for years has done therapy for many years and already has the tools to take care of her mental health. “I am very much from the here and now. The present. The rest anguishes me, creates anxiety. Thinking about what comes next creates a lot of uncertainty for me. When that happens to me I return to the here and now. And I ask myself: ‘How are you?’ ‘Well?’ Well, go ahead”.